Mom-bashing

24 Oct

I’ve had a topic come across my mind and my social media newsfeed quite a bit lately, and I can’t stop stewing about it.

Mom-bashing

Whether intentional or not, I would like to reach out to all my fellow moms, and non-moms, to knock it the hell off.  Talking badly about another woman and her parenting choices, does not make you appear any wiser, any cooler, or any more liked.  In fact, it kinda makes you look like a bitch and nobody wants to be around you.

I have friends that make their own babyfood, breastfeed, use cloth diapers, vow to never use a babysitter that isn’t family, do not ever eat fast food, do not vaccinate, only eat organic, deny their children all types of sugar, homeschool, had a natural birth, had c-sections, had tummy-tucks, don’t eat dairy, don’t watch TV, etc. etc.

I can guarantee you that nobody uses cloth diapers (a feat I would personally NEVER undertake) because they enjoy washing poop out of cloth several times a day.  They do it because they feel it’s better for their kids and they are trying to be the best parent they can be.

I can also guarantee you that my friend who is fortunate enough to have family-only babysitters will never speak ill of me for using non-family sitters.  Despite the fact that I have very little family to begin with, my husband was in the Marines and unfortunately, was not paid well enough for me to be a stay-at-home mom, so while moving around the gulf/east coast, I was not blessed with that choice.

I should’ve tried harder to breastfeed.  Well, I’m happy that your breasts are glorious milk-fountains that would be the envy of every wet-nurse this side of the 18th century, but, after hooking my breasts up to a machine for an hour at a time to get maaaaaaybe an ounce, I gave up.  There were better ways to spend my hours caring for my children than to sit around like an unsuccessful dairy cow.  Plus, I enjoy adult beverages, and that’s not conducive with breast feeding, or so I’ve been told.

I have had (many)others say hateful things about some of my different parenting choices.  But they can go bark up another tree.

My point- every parent is different, every one of us is trying to do our best.  There is a difference in having a discussion with another mom and sharing your information, and “bashing”.   So stop.  Unless there is some sort of imminent danger to the child, please, feel free to share your views, your information, your opinion (as long as it’s not shitty) and discuss.  But you are not better than me and I am not better than you.  Kthanks. 🙂

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4 Responses to “Mom-bashing”

  1. Ashley October 24, 2014 at 3:55 pm #

    I totally relate. I feel judged all the time about daycare and unsuccessful breastfeeding! Nobody should ever make a mom feel like she’s not doing enough to care for her child in the way she chooses and feels is best.

  2. souzaville007 October 25, 2014 at 7:52 pm #

    I totally agree that we as mothers need to stick together and help support rather then waste so much time judging one another on our parenting super theories…I have been a part of several mommy groups only to find that I am better off being an introvert which is really not healthy for my children. Therefore I carry on in trying to mold myself into something I am not in utter search for the handful of women that I would like to call friends.

  3. ckred27 October 27, 2014 at 2:26 pm #

    Agreed! I cant stand it when women bash each other. Some of it I think may be in my head, Ill go to the park w. my boys and my introvert brain just goes wild and thinks all the other moms are looking at my crazy boys and think I dont know what the hell Im doing, when they are probably thinking the same thing or just looking at my good lookin boys. But I also know there are the real judgy ones that dont like that I work, let the kids watch some TV, they are not always clean ect. Its depressing, so knowing I hate being judge I try to keep an open mind for all the different parenting styles out there. To each there own!

    • townsendlyssa October 27, 2014 at 6:06 pm #

      I hope nobody thinks that of me! I’m usually thinking “hmm I wonder if she’d be up for a play date” but as outgoing as I am, I still hold myself back from approaching for one reason or another.

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